Liar Liar Pants on Fire!

Dr. (Mrs.) M., a Government Medical Officer gets posted in a small village A near the her city of residence B. On paper, she is staying right in that village A PHC (Public Health Center). In the eyes of the C.S.(Civil Surgeon) and D.M.(District Magistrate) of the district of village A, she is putting up in the modest town that calls itself the District Headquarter. For the M.O.I.C. (Medical Officer In-charge), she is there in the 'office' for half-a-day, twice-weekly. For truth's sake, she is living in her permanent residence, which is about two hours of motorable distance from her place of posting, in city B.

Within a few days of getting this posting, Dr. M. decides to buy a car. To buy a car from a showroom of city B, she has to apply for a loan from a national bank that has branches in that same city. Since banks do not give loans so easily, they deem it necessary to come and check out the donee's well-off-ness. Especially, since Dr. M. being joint-owner of a house in the said city is the guarantee of the loan. Hence, here are the harried instructions to yours truly - "When you answer the doorbell or the phone and someone asks for me, be very careful while answering. If it's the C.S. or D.M.'s office, then I am not living here. I am living there. If it's the Bankers, then I am not living there. I am living here."

Golmaal hai bhai sab golmaal hai?

Hear another one -A cousin of mine is fond of her little jokes. So much so, that if you get a much awaited phone call (say, a friend you happened to mention to her hadn't called you recently) and you get that call, it's likely to be her trying to pull off a prank. Or if you get a call from 'Kaun Banega Karorpati', think twice before you exult. Or if she tells you someone's coming tomorrow, that someone ain't likely to make an appearance in the next three months.You get the idea...

Now this dame gets herself a flight from Banglore to Calcutta in the morning, from where she has to board the connecting flight to our city in the evening. The flight timings are altered, because of which she has to board the airbus within 30 minutes of landing at Dumdum. Naturally, she gives us all a ring so that we can send the car to meet her flight at the right time. And, equally naturally, the conversation takes the following turn -

Cousin - Ma, my flight was re-scheduled. I am boarding the flight now. Come to pick me up in an hour.

Aunt - Hahaha...try another one.

Cousin - Ma! I am serious.

Aunt - Yeah, yeah. Bye beta. I understand you must be getting quite bored sitting alone at the airport.

Line disconnected.

My cousin franctically rings up my place.

Cousin - Didi, I am sitting in the connecting flight now - they re-scheduled the flight. Please tell Ma to send over the car.

Me - Heeheehee...who do you think you are talking to, darling. I know you.

Cousin - Di, please believe me. Can't you hear the pilot's instructions in the background?

Me - Oh yes, I can make out someone screeching his lungs out. Dumdum is an International airport honey. A busy one, too.

Cousin - Offo. Talk to this uncle who is sitting next to me. (Aside) - Uncle, please tell my cousin I am actually on board this flight.

Uncle - Hello? Yes, this girl is sitting next to me and we shall reach in an hour.

Me - Hahahaha. Good imitation, my love. You can't fool me any, though, am afraid.

Line Disconnected.

That day, my cousin came home by taxi, managing all the luggage with "uncle's" help, who remained very mystified and bemused throughout the journey.

And they say lies can help!